Modern adoption aims to support adoptive families to stay in touch with the child’s birth relatives, where it is safe to do so and is in the best interest of the child.
Once an Adoption Order has been granted adopted parents legally hold all parental responsibility for that child and thus can make informed decisions in line with their welfare, including decisions around staying in touch plans.
There will be a plan to stay in touch with birth relatives at the point of a child being matched with their adoptive parents. This plan will be informed by who is important to the child now and in the future. Given the lifelong nature of adoption and the various ages and stages of a child as they grow up, these plans may change. Social workers will work with and support adoptive families and the child to determine this.
Indirect ways of staying in touch in adoption
Indirect methods of staying in touch have been the most common form of contact plans for children who are adopted. The Adoption UK Baromoter 2022, found that 82% of adoptive families had signed an agreement for ongoing indirect contact.
Indirect methods can include letters, emails, photographs, and objects created by the child, such as drawings. Indirect methods can be personalised and some adoptive families, for example, send strings to birth relatives to demonstrate how tall a child is.
Most adoption agencies have a dedicated team that supports exchanges, and these may be called letterbox teams, staying in touch teams, keeping in touch teams or family connection teams. The team can support both adoptive and birth families with exchanges and all exchanges are sent via this team. The central point of information exchange supports the data protection of all involved.
Digital exchange systems are also being piloted in some regional adoption agencies and may in the future form part of children’s staying in touch plans.
Having empathy for birth relatives can support how exchanges develop over time and meeting with birth relatives of an adopted child can also support with exchanging information. Adoption agencies can support this.
Family meet-ups or family time (direct contact) in adoption
Whilst indirect methods are used in most staying in touch plans, ‘family time’ or ‘meet ups’ are also a way that adoptive families can support their child in maintaining relationships with their birth family.
This generally involves meeting up with birth relatives at a neutral venue, supported by professionals if required, so children can spend quality time with their birth relatives. With any staying in touch plan, this needs to be what is in the best interest of an adopted child in line with their needs, wishes and feelings.
There are benefits to children having meet ups with appropriate birth relatives, such as, making sense of being a member of two families and avoiding some of the stress and difficulties of searching later on. The children can stay in touch with important people to them and understand more about why they needed to be adopted, whilst having the security to explore this within their adoptive family.
The Adoption UK Barometer 2022, found that direct contact was taking place in 31% of adoptions, most of these being direct contact with a child's siblings post adoption.
Relationships with siblings and wider birth family
Adopted children often have other family members, such as siblings and grandparents, who are important to them. They may not understand why they have been separated from their brothers and sisters which can be extremely traumatic for them. If in the child’s best interest, your adoption agency can support with staying in touch plans for adopted children and siblings or wider birth relatives.
